Drunk Dialing
by moonlite-n-roses
Summary: Friends don’t let friends dialdrunk. Unfortunately, for both Tommy and his friends, they aren’t around when Tommy finds his hidden bottle of tequila. Tommy isn’t aloud to drink tequila, this is the reason why. HUMOROUS ONESHOT


**Title:** Drunk-Dialing

**Rating:** M for language

**Paring:** None really, though Jason and Kim are married, so I guess that counts.

**Summary:** Friends don't let friends dial-drunk. Unfortunately, for both Tommy and his friends, they aren't around when Tommy finds his hidden bottle of tequila. Tommy isn't aloud to drink tequila, this is the reason why.

**Author's Note:** HUMOR people. This is humor! Not to be taken seriously.

**Author's Note2: **_Italics _are thoughts and stressed language. **Bold **is actions. **_Bold Italics _**the speaker is really pissed off.

* * *

**'Ring!!! Ring!! I'm your phone! Answer me!'**

Adam groaned as his cell phone rang, _why did I put that annoying ringtone on my phone, and who the hell is calling me at, two in the morning, _he thought to himself as he grabbed his phone, "Lo?"

"Hiiiiiii poofhead!"

Adam pulled the phone away from his head and looked at it, "What?" He put the phone back to his ear, "Tommy? The hell?" He asked a bit incoherently.

"Nooo… _I _am _The Winged Lord of the Skies!!_" Tommy crowed, "_You_… you are just a poofy-headed frog!"

Adam pulled the phone away from his ear again and just glared at it, as if he could send 'death-glares' through the phone. "Tommy, I am saying this to you as your friend, your comrade, and your brother…**_Fuck off_!!**" He flipped his phone closed and tossed it back on the nightstand. "Hayley needs to do a better job of hiding the tequila," he grumbled to himself as he lay back down.

"Hey! Poofhead? Poofhead? Helllooooooooo?" Tommy looked at his phone, "I guess he hung up. Stupid poofhead," he grumbled and scrolled through his phone, "Ah-ha!" He hit send.

Jason picked up his phone on the first ring, "Hello?"

"Hellooooooooo?"

"Tommy? What the…it's like two thirty in the morning bro, what's going on?" Jason asked, not quite sure why exactly his best friend was calling him so late at night.

"Tommy? Who is this Tommy you speak of? _I_… I am The Great Falcon, _you_… you are just a Tyranohead!"

"The fuck? Tommy, have you been doing tequila shots again, I thought Hayley said no more tequila?" Jason asked, thinking to himself, _I'm going to kill him, if Tyrano was still around, I'd step on him with it_.

"Hayley isn't here Tyranohead, and don't call me Tommy! I'll eat you with my might, Dragonzord!"

Jason sighed, "Go to sleep dumbass, and lay off the tequila!" He grumbled as he hung up his phone. "Dumb Tyranohead my ass, just wait till I tell Hayley," he said as he slid his phone back into his pocket, and turned his attention back to the movie he was watching.

Tommy shrugged as the call ended and scrolled through his phone again and hit send. When the female grumpily answered the phone, he laughed, "Aiiiiiiiiishaaaaaaaa!!! Hey!! Guess what?!?!"

Aisha stared at her phone, glaring daggers; "You're going to die next time I see you?" She suggested as an answer since yes, she was going to kill him next time she saw him.

Tommy gasped, "No!!! That's mean... why are you yellows so violent? Don't be violent... you should be sweeeeeettttt... like caaaaannnnddddyyyyy!" He started giggling hysterically. "Sweeeeeeeeeeeeet!"

"I'll show you sweet," Aisha grumbled under her breath, "Tommy," she said a mock sugary-sweet voice, "I want you to hang up the phone, and go lay down, close your eyes and dream happy dreams, okay?"

"Like pink rangers?"

_Oh for the love of…_she thought, rolling her eyes, "Sure, whatever floats your boat, just... **_Get the hell off my phone!!_"** she yelled, slamming her phone down.

"She needs laid, then she wouldn't be so mean," Tommy grumbled to himself. "Oooh, I can solve that!" He quickly scrolled to the next number.

Tommy waited for the person on the other end to pick up, "Rooockooo, Roockooo, it's your fearless leeeaaadddeeerrr!"

Rocky grumbled into the phone, still half asleep, "Tommy, shut up and go to sleep," he mumbled.

"No! I have a command for you. Aisha needs laid so she'll stop being mean to me."

Rocky sat up in his bed, "What?"

"Aisha was mean to me _and _she yelled at me, she needs laid, you want her, so go get her," Tommy said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Rocky pulled the phone away from his ear and stared at it, blinking a few times, "I must be dreaming," he said to himself before bringing to the phone back up to his ear, "Tommy? Are you drunk or something?"

"Who me? Everyone knows Power Rangers don't drink! I'm _The Winged Lord of the Skies, The Great Falcon!!! _I don't need alcohol, especially not tequila!" Tommy cried into the phone, indignantly.

"Tommy, step away from the tequila and go to sleep," Rocky said before he hung up on him.

"Dumb Tyranohead the second," Tommy grumbled at the silence on the other side of the line. "Why won't nobody talk to meeee," he practically whined to himself, the obnoxious part of his drunken melee now past.

Tommy scrolled through his numbers again, finding one and hit send, "Helloooo!!!"

"Tommy? What the hell, it's like almost four in the morning in Cali, what are you calling me for? Is Jason alright?" Kim asked in a rush, not registering the slur in Tommy's tone.

"No, he's a dumb Tyranohead, so is Rocky. Adam's a poofy-headed frog, and Aisha is mean and needs laid, but Rocky won't do it!" Tommy whined into the phone. "They don't love me! You still love me, right Kimme?"

Kim groaned softly, _I'm going to kill him, _"Yes I still love you Tommy, I'd love you a lot more if you'd stop drunk-dialing people at ridiculous times of the night," she replied, sighing the sigh of the put-upon.

"You're being mean to me!!"

"I'll show you mean, just wait till I get ahold of Hayley, she's going to kick your ass," Kim shot back, agitated by the all out whine in his voice.

"Why are you being mean to me!" Tommy whined more, a pout evident in his tone.

"Because you called my husband a Tyranohead!" Kim cried exasperatedly.

"Rocky's not your husband," Tommy pointed out, momentarily forgetting he'd also called Jason that as well.

"No, but Jason is," Kim sighed, "Tommy, I think all those different ranger powers have addled your brains. Now **_Go…To…Bed!_**" she ordered before hanging up the phone.

* * *

The next morning Tommy rolled over on his bed, "Oh my god, my head is killing me," he groaned, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. He opened them, only to find his bottle of 1800, on it's side and empty, on the nightstand. "Ooh, shit!" he grabbed this phone and scrolled to the dialed call list, "Ooh no, they're gonna kill me. Shit!" 

'KNOCK, KNOCK'

"**_Thomas James Oliver!_** I know you're in there!" A loud and thoroughly agitated voice came through the door. It was attached to a loud and thoroughly agitated Hayley.

"Oh shit, it's Hayley, I'm a dead man," he said frantically, trying to find a place to hide before she picked the lock.


End file.
